Blood Money 

To say I was a squeamish child would be a vast understatement. I remember in elementary school doing the finger prick to check our blood type. I passed out. We then visited a hospital, specifically the blood bank, I saw one, two, three and floor. I woke up in a hospital bed. Every time I had to have blood drawn for a test, I went down. I started to really wonder how much truth there was to “every time you faint, you lose 1,000 brain cells”… Of course, I’m not sure I would’ve remembered where I’d left them if I hadn’t fainted. That was my early child to teen years.

In my adulthood, I was diagnosed with diabetes and had to give myself a shot everyday, three times a day. You better believe there were times I hit the skin wrong and was sure I was going to bleed out… I say all of this to tell you about the power of the mind.

I am a delivery driver for a sub shop. A few months back, I’m delivering an order to a place called, well, I’ll call it John Smith Plasma.

I see the word plasma and think big screen TVs. What else COULD it be?

So I parked and walked carefree up to the door and into the building only paying mild attention to the paper taped to the glass door. Something about no one under the age of 18 is permitted without an adult? Woah. They must sell some seriously expensive shit in here!

My first few steps into the building… were confusing. Not. A. Single. TV.

How do they expect to sell their product without any display models? These guys have no idea what they’re doing!

I step up to the desk and announce that I have a delivery for John Smith. She pages him and tells me to wait a minute.

This gives me time to look around. However little there was to see.

There were a couple of posters with smiling faces encouraging me to “help save a life by donating plasma today”. Are these guys fuckin’ nuts? You want me to DONATE a plasma tv? You think I could even afford a plasma tv? God, where has society as a whole, decayed to the point of needing a tv to live? I was outraged.

I was about to go off on someone, anyone who would listen, about how ridiculous this whole place was when I heard “Real food. Thank you! You can only survive on cookies & OJ for so long.” As I turned to face Mr. Smith, the light hit me. He was in a lab coat and still wearing his purple plastic gloves when he took the food and pen from my hand.

Thank God for that front desk. I had just enough time to catch the ledge before going down. I was able to steady myself long enough for him to sign a credit card slip before I bolted into the fresh air.

Before I could comprehend the enormity of my stupidity, I thanked my brain for protecting me. I know I wouldn’t have been able to go in if I had actually known what it was.

Ignorance may be bliss but sometimes it’s survival.

Have you ever been in such denial amidst the obvious?

I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

IMG_0985
It could SO be a big box store!

Published by spiredone

I am what a majority of the general population would call "crazy" and at this point in my life, I wear that label with love. I am a lifelong circus act. I'm focusing on balance while learning to juggle. I write about deeply overwhelming emotions like grief and I also go out and perform stand up comedy. I am a constant work in progress, as we all are. So, join me on my journey if you'd like but respect is a must. Otherwise I'll have my elephant crush you in the center ring, under the Big Top. :) Seriously, who needs that negative shit in their life? Namaste.

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